I don’t mean to get set in a pattern and make this a blog about sex. However, here's an entry about something that we rarely discuss (though I most guys do this and for many like me, it has been the ‘main’ sex act for years). It’s called ‘frottage’ (as per the definition, frottage is a public act and non-consensual—like groping in the train—but then I haven’t come across a term closer in meaning).
Here’s an article on frotteurism (as it also known—the words seem to be of French origin) from www.outinamerica.com. Had I written the article myself 15 years ago, it would have begun with exactly the same led: “For years I’ve been doing something that I’ve always considered a little odd, perhaps even subversive. It’s a sexual act that I thought had no official description or wording, and it’s something I’ve had a hard time describing to my friends….”
Of course, like the author, I beg to differ from Luke Shelton and Bill Weintraub of The Man2Man Alliance (I haven't seen the site yet) on their rhetoric on the politics and pleasures of anal sex (the link goes to my related post; see their quotes in the article mentioned above).
The author says that “for a lot of us, frottage is as good as, if not better than, anal sex.” Until recently, that was true for me as well. Right now, I am not sure if frottage is better. :-)
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4 comments:
You might find this interesting:
http://www.edifyingspectacle.org/weblog/archives/love_and_lust/frotting_frottage.php
Rubbing your crotch on unsuspecting individuals in the train/subway is molestation. I am hoping the other party in your frottage wasn't an unwilling participant.
Anon, as I indicated, 'frottage' may be defined as non-consensual but it's been rarely if ever non-consensual for me. In fact, I can't remember initiating it myself on a partner who's willing or otherwise. I admit there may be some gay men who don't take the hint/message from unwilling partners and it amounts to molestation but I guess their numbers would be proportionally the same (or even lesser considering gay people in India are mostly closeted) to the number of lecherous men who do the same to women on public transport.
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